About a week ago, I finally started feeling genuine baby thumps. I’d felt a few flutters every now and again, but I could never be sure that it was actually him kicking or just things shifting around to accommodate my ever growing baby boy.
The best kick was right after I’d just had to run out of a meeting to go throw up. I was mortified as I walked back into the conference room, bleary eyed and red faced, and tried not to make eye contact with anyone. But they all knew, that was the most embarrassing part. So I sat down, sipped my water, continued to take slow and deep breaths, and did my best to look like I was paying attention.
This is when he started to kick a little, so I looked down at my stomach and then I saw it. Three little taps in a row that made a tiny part of my belly poke out. It was like he was trying to say “Sorry Mom, I didn’t mean to make you so sick!” My heart melted and all the embarrassment no longer mattered.
That was the best kick, until this morning. Again, I was not feeling so well. This time I’d woken up at 7:30 on a Sunday (boo!) because of a sharp, searing pain in my hips. Oh, and a little heartburn too, just to keep things interesting. But then he started kicking me on my left side, a nice solid thump every 30 seconds or so for a few minutes. I’m fairly certain that he had the hiccups.
It’s moments like this that I get so sad that he’s only going to be inside me for a few more months. Despite the not so fun side effects of pregnancy, I love that he is all mine right now and it tucked away safely inside my tummy. I get jealous when I think that after he is born, other people will get to hold him. The little girl in me, who apparently didn’t learn how to share in preschool wants to scream, “He’s mine, give him back!!!” and then bite them if they refuse. I’m lucky to have so many people who already love him and can’t wait to hold him and kiss him, and I will gladly share him when the time comes. But, for now, he is all mine and I’m loving every minute of it.