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The Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day

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I am smack dab in the middle of a never ending bad day.

It all started yesterday, when my insurance company told me that they won’t pay for part of the Anesthesiologist claim from my c-section. “Part” being $900.

Why, you ask? Because they think my c-section wasn’t “medically necessary”.

ARE YOU *&%$#@ KIDDING ME?????????

Apparently Emmett’s heart rate dropping from 130 to 50 repeatedly over the course of my labor, including the 2 hours of unproductive pushing, is not anything to be concerned with.

You know what the worst part about this is? It’s bringing up all the unresolved emotions I have left over from my c-section. The guilt, the what if’s, the feeling that I failed my baby and myself. I know I didn’t, but this stupid insurance claim is bringing it all back again. They’re making me feel like I made the wrong decision, like I did something wrong.

Next up. While pumping at work yesterday, in a LOCKED room, someone with a key unlocked the door and walked in. Don’t mind me! I’m just sitting here topless massaging my bewbs while this machine sucks breast milk out of them. Nothing to see here!

And finally, as I was getting ready to go to bed last night, my poor little Monkeyface threw up ALL over our bed and me. Twice. And once again this morning, because the stomach flu has no mercy, even on small and very cute babies.

I’m not whining about all this so I get a bunch of sympathy, rather to point out how well I am holding it together, despite all this bullshit. Yes, I’m complaining about it on every form of social media possible, but have I had a total sobbing till I get Alice Cooper eyes meltdown? No!

The old me would have taken a xanax, crawled under the covers and called it a day.

I’m not sure if it’s having a baby or if I’m finally maturing at the age of 31, but I’m not as much of a wreck as I used to be. So that’s the silver lining to the gloomy cloud hanging over my head.


2 responses »

  1. WHAT! how shitty!

    (am i allowed to swear on your blog?)

    The part that makes me most angry is the insurance. How dare they!? Insurance companies make me angrier than anything IN THE WORLD. (I will take a cue from you and follow that up by saying – “literally.”) 🙂

    I hope today is much, much better than yesterday. I mean, it’s practically guaranteed, right? I think the universe owes you one this weekend.

    • The universe seems to be making up for my bad day- it’s gloriously sunny out today, I’ve had my vanilla latte, the baby is napping and later on we’re going shoe shopping. Life is good.

      And yes, you are allowed to swear on my blog. 🙂 I have yet to drop the eff bomb though, I’m saving that for a special occasion.


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